Never is Just Reven Spelled Backwards: Famous House Quotes
This is where you post all of the super-wonderful and memorable lines from House. Enjoy. :D

I'm just gonna go a bit crazy with the lines :D (Stacy and Cameron, although among the many lines I've typed, can go fall fown the elevator shaft and die a terribly, painful and drawn out death.) Wilson: "You can be a real jerk sometimes, you know that?" House: "Yeah. And you’re the good guy." Wilson: "At least I try." House: "As long as you’re trying to be good, you can do whatever you want." Wilson: "And as long as you’re not trying, you can say whatever you want." House: "So between us, we can do anything. We can rule the world!" Stacy: "What are you hiding?" House: "I'm gay." Stacy glares at him. House: "Oh, that's not what you meant. But it does explain a lot, though. No girlfriend, always with Wilson, obsession with sneakers..." Wilson: "Seriously man, have you ever actually driven an automobile before? There are four gears." House: "The '66 came with a 'shut up' button." Wilson: "Xs are the kisses..." House: "No... I think they're the hugs. I think Os are the kisses." Wilson: "No... No... Xs are definately the kisses." Wilson: "House, this is God." House: "Look, I'm a little busy right now... Not supossed to talk during these things. Go time thursday? Wilson: "Let me check... Oh! I got a plauge!" Wilson: "The healer with his magic powers, I could rub his gentle brow for hours, His manly chest, His stuble jaw, Everything about him, Leaves me raw..." House: "Phsyc ward's upstairs." Wilson: "With joy, Oh, House Your very name, Will never leave this girl the same. That's not bad for and 82-year-old. She asked me to give this to her true love." House: "Well, what can I say? Chicks with no teeth turn me on." Wilson: "That's fairly disgusting... " House: "And that's ageism." Wilson: "You better watch yourself around this babe. Here are her test results." Foreman: "Where were you two when the guy woke up?" Chase: "We... just stepped out." Foreman: "To do what?" Chase: "To get a coffee, we'd been up most of the night." Foreman: "You didn't have any coffee when you came back..." Cameron: "Alright, already, we confess! We snuck into one of the sleep lab rooms to have sex. We shouldn't have done it while we were supossed to be working, and we're sorry. Now can we get on with the deferential diagnosis?" Foreman: "House'll do Wilson before you do Chase." Cameron: "No... you will do House and Wilson before I do Chase." Chase: "She did me once!" Foreman: "She was stoned!" House: "Why are you suspicious?" Wilson: "Because it's either that or accept the fact that you've done something nice and then I have to deal with the Horsemen and the Rain of Fire and the End of Days." Wilson: "You're pissed at House! I get it: you're symbolicating killing him! Symbolicating? Symbolicalating. Gosh, that's a hard word." Wilson: "You know he wants you, you know he's good, you know he can make you good. I don't know what I'm saying... I don't... you don't... I don't... you know what I'm saying, and you know I'm right. I gotta go." House: "Aha! You yawned!" Wilson: "Aha! You tried to kill me." Wilson: "I'm not on anti-depressants, I'm on speed!" House (after a pause): "Mr. Well-Adjusted is just as messed up as the rest of us. I mean, why would you keep that a secret? Are you ashamed of recognising how pathetic your life is?" Wilson: "It’s not a secret! House! It’s… personal." House: "How long has it been personal?" Wilson: "It's personal..." House: "Yawning's recent, so that means either you just started or you changed perscriptions." Wilson: "This is why I take them." House: ""They're anti-depressants, not anti-annoyance-ants. You think this would naturally come up in conversation—" Wilson: "Oh, don't act hurt! You don't care!" Wilson: "You always find some flaw to push people away. Your real fear is having a good relationship." House: "A big, romantic weekend in The Poconos could change everything." Wilson: "You sent those flowers to me!"

Doris Egan wrote this line for 'Son of a Coma Guy' but it was cut for time, which is too bad because it's just brilliant. After House tells his story about why he became a doctor, Gabe turns to Wilson for confirmation. Wilson: I can't tell you that it happened. I can tell you that it's true.

this is kind of a long one. Wilson: 20. Cuddy: Call. House: You'll call anything. Cuddy: My stack's bigger than your stack. You in or out? House: You know that relative to their size, gorillas have smaller testicles than humans. Cuddy: Well then you'd probably have an edge over a gorilla, but not over me. House: Reason is, primate teste size inversely corresponds to the fidelity of our females. Wilson: Do you think there might be a better time to annoy me about my wife? House: I'm talking about poker. Wilson: Right. Cuddy: Women are evil, you're right to drive them away. Call fold or raise, storytime can wait! House: We're smaller and better than chimps, bigger and worse than gorillas. For all our rationality, our supposed trust and fealty to a higher power, our ability to create a system of rules and laws; our baser drives are more powerful than any of that. We want to control our emotions, but we can't. If we're happy, things don't annoy us. If on the other hand, we're sitting on crappy hold cards, little tiny things annoy us a whole lot more. I raise. Wilson: So are you going to tell me an annoying story everytime I raise? House: God that would be annoying.

Best. Line. Ever. House (to Wilson after that dumb stunt in 97 Seconds): I love you.

Foreman: Big hand points to minutes, maybe you could've gotten them mixed up. House: Ohhh! Snap! You're at a huge cultural disadvantage Chase take a couple minutes to think up a witty retort. Chase: Hey Foreman, your momma's so fat, when her beeper goes off, people think she's backing up!!!

House: You test drive a car before you buy it. You have sex before you get married. I can't hire a team based on a ten-minute interview. What if I don't like having sex with them? WILSON: I'm sure it looked easier on YouTube.

"Help!!!!!!!! I'm trapped inside a monitor!" Cuddy: A little part of me,- House: There is no little part of you.

House: Where are we going? Wilson: Nowhere, I just know it hurts you. Amber(deadpan voice): I know. It's going to be awesome Two win-worthy quotes. :D

THE BEST- "Everybody Lies." And i don't remember exact words but it was when Cuddy told Wilson that Amber (CTB) would drag him to her lair and impregnate him with her eggs and next thing, there'd be a chalked shaped Wilson on the ground.

A new favorite of mine: Hospital Inspector: I've heard your name. House: Most people have -- it's also a noun.