First, here is the URL for where you can find a legal copy of the PDF file of the original version of the show. The site in general - BBC Writer’s Room – is kind of a collective writing workshop and always is filled with interesting things.
Script URL:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/writersroom/insight/downloads/scripts/life_on_mars_ep_1.pdf
BBC Writer’s Room Script Archive:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/writersroom/insight/script_archive.shtml
For the show, I think it works with the US audience. The UK version was a little more refined, but that is probably just because of how the shooting schedule works over there; an entire season is often filmed before the broadcast of the pilot episode, unless they are trying to test-run a pilot (such as the case in Being Human). And the UK seasons are shorter, so we’ll probably get the full series run in the US if there is a full season ordered by ABC.
Characterization. Ray works well for the US audience, as does Gene; and they both look the part remarkably well. Annie could be good if she could relax more, and Chris is not buffoonish enough. O’Mara doesn’t really have much chemistry there, but he’s improved. I still miss some of the UK lines, but they were lines that would not make sense to the US audience (“It’s five pm and I’m having hoops for dinner”). I can see where some of the things that define the characters had to be cut to fit the entire episode into the US timeslot, but hopefully with some time, it will be developed.
One other thing that bugged me is that some of the production effects that made the original work – the specific music cues and the point where Gene and Sam jumped over the desk – didn’t work here. They were just either too early or at a point where it was almost an afterthought. In the original, when Mrs. Raimes tells Gene and Sam that the music stopped, they jumped over the desk immediately and the music started. Here, not so much. The music starts, everyone moves around a bit, and then the two jump. Why bother by that point when they had obviously moved around the desk already? It’s more like the director decided to put things because they were in the UK version rather than work out a reason for doing it.
I did like how the ending of the episode differed. In the original, I didn’t like how Annie’s boyfriend was stalking Sam and playing a prank on him. That was just bad-form. But, this worked much better – both the arrest and Sam stalking Colin as a kid, as well as Maya coming on the “radio” to tell him that she was safe.
Overall, this was a huge improvement on the leaked premiere.